Another sleepless night inched by. I swear I was aware of every single second. My eyes are red and my face is puffy with tiredness. During the hours I lay awake, I fought a waterfall of tears. It was like having a geyser in my head. As I glimpsed myself in the bathroom mirror on my way to the kitchen for a strong coffee, I grimaced at my reflection. Right, major beauty fixing products application required.

Half an hour later I looked at myself again and decided I had done some serious repairs. Now I looked like I was hung over or alternately had a migraine. Next a tough no-nonsense pantsuit and I would do. I got that far, and straightened my hair. And then boy was I ever sick.

So I called my boss and told him I wouldn’t be in, rescheduled my appointments and phoned for a doctor’s appointment. I took off the suit and put it way, and hauled on some casual clothes. Great. Just what I need.

I wandered up and saw the doctor, and came away with a script to settle my insides and a referral to a skin specialist for a lesion on my leg – just to make sure it isn’t melanoma. Isn’t it interesting the things which flash through your minds when a doctor says things like that, especially since that thing has been on my calf for some time. It would be good to have it checked out.

Home I came – restlessly I threw on my runners and went for a walk, iPod running my walking music, lost in the music and the lyrics, and the pacing of my feet. So now I am waiting for a callback from the specialist telling me when the appointment will be and I have today and tomorrow home sick.

3 comments on “Morning

  1. Hang in there- I suspect you need this time to be alone and just enjoy the solitude. *hugs*

  2. There is something to be said for counting particles of dust floating on sunbeams in the quiet stillness of an empty house. Or you could watch TV and lose yourself in a movie.

  3. Get well soon… 🙂

    Incognito x

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